Why Is It So Hard To Change?

May 23, 2010 by  
Filed under Blog

4514367690_b9e59f6ac1_mI think one of the reasons it is so hard, it’s because in most cases that would mean we would have to come to terms with having been, having done or having acted in the “wrong” way.

And so because we are so attached to the concepts of right and wrong the intermediary step of recognizing that we and life could have been different if only we had known what we know now, a difficult one to take.

Let me be specific:

I have missed many business opportunities in my life because of an ego which, seemed at first look, to be inflated but which in truth hid a frail ego.  For me to change and therefore change the outcome of my present and future business dealings, I had to recognize I was responsible for a lot of my own luck or lack of.  I had at a certain point two choices to make:  1 – Continue as I was and therefore never have to deal with the self-blame  or 2 – Realize I acted the way I did because that was all my ego could handle at the time,  embrace the loss, and move on.  I chose choice #2.  It wasn’t easy and it never is to know things could have been different if only.  So we grieve the loss, we realize in reality it couldn’t have been any different, and we rejoice in knowing that we now have a better handle at least in the issue at hand.  That is how things and we make changes in our lives.

Unfortunately a lot of people chose to continue being a certain way to avoid taking responsibility for the outcome of many circumstances in their lives.   That of course is a very shortsighted way of living, because all we do is continue to repeat behavior which has already proven to us to sabotage any positive outcome.

So however hard it is for us to look in the mirror and see our true reflection, with all its “perfections” and ‘imperfections”, it is an important step to take in building the lives we want to live.

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