Self Sabotage; A Very Dangerous Activity

May 24, 2010 by  
Filed under Blog

heart in hands

heart in hands

Here’s a question, how many of us tell ourselves the following phrase “I’m going to show them” over and over again?  How many of us actually cause things to go wrong and by saying “I’m going to show them” we have a false feeling of vindication?

Let me be specific.  We decide we want something in life: a promotion, a career, a relationship, then we orchestrate things to a point where things go south, we then become the victim but underneath is all is the fact we didn’t live through what we professed we wanted in the first place.    We were scared of either really succeeding or loosing and so we manipulate ourselves, others and situations so we can end up like victims.  And as victims we can obtain a false sense of courage with things like: I’ll show them.  Wouldn’t it be easier to really try for whatever we want?  If we failed or won wouldn’t that be rewarding?

Rewarding because we did everything we could, we gave it our best, and so we have the satisfaction of truthfully going for it.

Because of our misguided attitude we end up spending so much of our lives like victims feeling it to be safer than actually putting it all on the line.  The downside of being afraid is of course there are no possibilities for success or for a feeling of mission well done.  When we coward behind “I’ll show them” all that is left to us is to feel sorry for ourselves.

  • Winsor Pilates

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