Why Are People So Crazy And What Can We Do About It?

June 29, 2010 by  
Filed under Blog

How many times a day do we say or think: “People are crazy?”  That’s because we feel it is hard to navigate through their expectations and/or agendas.  We often don’t know what is motivating them and so we are startled by their reaction.

We all have our fears, hang-ups, and hidden motivators.  If we are the kind of people that invest in our personal development we tend to catch ourselves when acting from fear but a great number of us are disconnected from their truth and go through life acting out whatever drama is playing in their heads.

How do we deal with that?

By being so connected to our own selves that regardless how others think or act, we will be okay.

Now there is a difference between not caring about others, and having thought through a situation – by looking at all sides – and then making a decision in how to proceed.

We have no way to truly understand what goes on within someone else’s mind and their response system so trying to understand becomes an often difficult and troublesome task.  Instead if we just accept their reaction, have compassion, but act how we think we should, we will save ourselves a lot of heartache.

After many years of spending a lot of my time trying to understand why people do what they do, I now just accept their reaction without making it be about me.

I think back to some of the guys I dated before getting married, a great source of wonderful learning stories, and an Argentine painter comes to mind.  As many of you know, I was born and raised in Brazil, and so meeting a fellow artist from Latin America, also living in LA, was pretty exciting.

We went out to dinner and spent four hours talking, looking into each other’s eyes, and having a great time.  When we said goodbye we made plans to talk the following afternoon to pick another restaurant to go to. Needless to say, I never heard from the guy again even though I called many times and left many messages.  At that time that was very distressing to me.  I just couldn’t understand.  I called people that I thought knew him and wrecked my brain but because I couldn’t come up with any logical reason, I turned the situation against me.  I must have said something at the very end that turned him away, I thought.  Years later I found out the guy had a live in girlfriend and so our date was either too great, which threatened his relationship, or it was just a fun night out.

Either way the important lesson is, we don’t know why others act or think in certain ways.  My correct reaction should have been; I had a fun night but obviously there is something else going on with this man and so I’m moving on and wishing him peace.

In every relationship, even if it is one with a taxi driver taking us to the airport, being connected with our own selves will allow us to navigate the human inter-connectedness’ waters and remain afloat in peace and love for ourselves and others.

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