What It Takes To Love
Just found the below article on Oprah.com and wanted to share it with you.
The post “What It Takes To Love Well And Wisely” discusses the transformative power of romantic love. That is because in intimate relationships we get to show ourselves in ways we don’t in other relationships. We also get to know parts of us which are called upon in romantic relationships.
I believe for a romantic relationship to be “successful” we must first be a complete person; love ourselves, and have our own interests. It is then we can be vulnerable without the feeling that we are losing ourselves. It is then we can truly share without feeling we are giving up on our own lives.
Humans are meant to be in societies, groups and relationships. We are social beings and romantic relationships are part of the world we must inhabit. Even when the relationship ends in pain and frustration we have learned things about ourselves and life we didn’t know before. We evolve with every experience.
I have been in love twice in my life; once when I was fourteen and then again with my late husband. In between I had painful relationships, short-lived relationships, and inconsequential relationships. But each one of them served a purpose in my life.
I would hope that one day I will have the opportunity to give my love to someone else in a profound and intimate way. In the meantime I know I have to continue learning to love myself while taking down the barriers that keep me “protected/apart” from others.
By Cathleen Medwick
On my way to interview Dr. Ethel Person, M.D., the celebrated psychoanalyst and Columbia University professor who teaches and writes about love, I took a little detour into my past. Around the corner from Person’s home was the quaint old brownstone where, long ago, a handsome stranger arrived on my doorstep.
He wasn’t looking for love; he was looking for an apartment…Continued