Midlife Crisis Or An Opportunity For Change
At the end of a meeting yesterday, I stayed behind to talk to a dear friend who is in his 60s. He wanted to tell me he was investigating new paths for his life. He has been a successful producer, husband, and father, and was now feeling the need for a change. He has built a life that affords him the time and finances to ponder what’s next.
As we talked, I understood he was concerned his move was to be an actual next phase and not a crisis or an end.
Our conversation made me think how much we believe the ideas we have created about who we are and what our lives are about. Simply put we identify with the image we have of ourselves. Unfortunately that identification keeps us stuck. The image has very little flexibility and often brings anxiety, fear and disappointment. Having the ability to turn a page to experience new challenges is what keeps us vibrant and alive.
When we are young we have no fear of trying new things and of changes. The fear comes in later years when we have become attached to an image we have created of ourselves and our lives. That is why the midlife crisis is a crisis instead of an opportunity to re-evaluate a chunk of our lives and decide what changes we want to employ to continue the only valuable quest we have — to love and to learn.
Do you identify with an image of yourself or of a life? If that doesn’t come to fruition in a satisfactory way will you not be same individual? Remember, you are more than what you present to the world or how the world sees you.
Midlife Crisis: A Misleading Myth or a Reality in Search of a New Name?
by Vivian Diller, Ph.D.
Although originally used by psychologists to describe a transitional stage in adult development, today the midlife crisis is often associated with the guy in his 40s who finds a young girlfriend and runs off in his new sports car; or the woman, about the same age, who reinvents herself, buys a new wardrobe — and sometimes buys a new face. Is it a myth? An excuse for impulsive, bad behavior and unrealistic transformations? …Continued