Let Go Of Expectations

May 4, 2012 by  
Filed under Blog

“I mean, like most guys, you carry around this girl in your head, who is exactly who you want her to be. The person you think you will love the most. And every girl you are with gets measured against this girl in your head.”  ― Rachel Cohn, Dash & Lily’s Book of Dares

And because of that, you can never be happy. And you can never see the possibilities with all the girls you’ve been with.  That’s called expectation.

Expectation: The act of conducting oneself according to an imagined result.

When we imagine how things are going to turn out we start behaving in a certain way instead of responding to what is actually taking place. When we do that the discrepancy between our imagined outcome and our reality creates a fair amount of anxiety, frustration and ultimately disappointment.

It is difficult for us not to have expectations, especially from people or circumstances that are meaningful to us.  The reason is fairly simple; our imagination takes us where we want to go not where we are.

One of the negative side effects of expectations is the rigidity that it creates.  Once we imagine an outcome we become married to it. We lose our ability to see and feel situations as they are.

If we could push our expectations aside and live situations and relationships for what they are, we would certainly find a greater deal of satisfaction.

Holding on to created ideas stops us from finding the positive in our current situations.  Somehow we don’t see what it is.  We only see what it isn’t.

The only way I know to let go of expectations, is by living in the moment and seeing situations and people as they are while releasing what they are not.  By living in the moment – and letting day dreams pass us by – we give ourselves permission to embrace what it is thus enjoying the present.

 

 

 

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