Stop Killing Time
Yesterday, I was on the phone with a friend who was telling me how unhappy he had been. He wasn’t happy with his relationship. He wasn’t happy with his work. Mostly he was just coping.
I told him I didn’t mind talking to him about his issues, but wanted to point out they had been the same for the past five years. Once I said that, he tried to change the subject as he didn’t want to have any responsibility for his current unhappiness.
After we hung up the phone, I thought about how many of us stay stuck in situations that are no longer happy or productive simply because we are used to them.
In other words, my friend was giving up on the possibility of being in a more satisfying relationship because he was used to being with the woman he is with. Leaving her would mean changing everything in his life. And what if he never found anyone else again? Always a possibility, but we shouldn’t only change things in our lives when we are certain we have something else to replace them with. Especially when it comes to relationships. I say especially because sometimes we need time alone to check back in with ourselves and reorganize our hopes and needs before moving forward.
Having the courage to realize we need to change something fundamental in our lives, is step number one. Number two, is digesting, getting used to the idea of change. Third, is actually taking concrete steps to initiate change.
I know it is almost impossible to do everything we want the way we want all the time. But, we should aim at not lingering in situations that we are certain are no longer feeding our lives.
Our journey has a limited time to happen. Why would you spend so much of it coasting or killing time?