A Few Steps To A Better Life

What’s the worst that could happen?  That has become my mantra when I start to feel anxious or afraid about something.  I actually ask myself the question and run through all the answers and usually find that I can handle the worst case scenario and so I take a few deep breaths and start to relax.  It sounds easy but it has taken me a very long time to get to this point. 

Another thing that has taken me a long time to come to is the decision to be happy.  I used to be very self destructive.  I often put myself in situations where it was impossible for a happy ending to occur.  Basically I lived in chaos.  So one day I just got really sick of it and decided I would live differently.  First I cut some people out of my life.  Mostly because of the qualities they brought out in me.  Then I promise myself I wouldn’t get bothered by everything that happened and that I wouldn’t get pulled into other people’s dramas.  I would continue to be a good listener but I would set boundaries. 

The third step I took was to every day find things that I could do that brought a smile to my face.  Then it was the “what’s the worst that could happen?” question. 

The final step was believing that I deserved respect.  I’m still working on this last step but life changed and still is changing while I apply all the steps described above. 

In a very short time after deciding to live differently, I met my husband, who was kind and supportive and as distinct as possible from all the bad boys I used to date.  I also accomplished more with my work and became more self assured.  The most important though is that life became more fulfilling.  I’m more aware of the small moments; like spending the day yesterday with my sister and nieces who are visiting from Italy.  Being aware that being together and laughing is a precious time gave me a sense of well being and belonging.  There is such power in the little things.  

So I keep working on my steps and looking to add a very more.