Don’t Let Fear Of Loss Close Your Heart

November 1, 2010 by  
Filed under Blog

Angie Rubin

I’m in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, the city and country I grew up in, visiting my parents.

I have not lived in this city for over twenty years, and so being here is always very emotional as I reconnect with past feelings and history.

I am here staying with my parents who are now in their 80s. I’m aware of their frailty and our time together coming to an end.  I’m not living the pain of loss, but I recognize the beginning of my own grieving process. I honor my feelings while I create new experiences.

As I deal with my emotions, thoughts come to my mind:  would it have been easier if I had let past disagreements have broken us apart?  Would it be easier now, if I had stopped myself from loving them as much as I do?

As I entertain those thoughts I realize that’s what so many of us do with our relationships, wishes and desires.

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Learning To Be A Member Of The World Community

June 22, 2010 by  
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I get all choked up when I see a fire truck or an ambulance rush by and all the cars move out of the way.  It’s not that I’m attracted to the pain happening to someone else, it’s that my emotion comes from observing that for a moment a great many people come together to assist someone they don’t even know.

I was born in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil and then lived in NYC for many years.  For some reason in those cities people don’t really pay much attention to ambulances.  But here in Los Angeles all the cars move out of the way.  Maybe that’s the reason why this event has caught my attention, the ambulance determined to get to its destination on time so it can save a life and all the surrounding drivers assist in the mission.

You might be thinking “why is she going on and on about ambulances?”

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What’s Kissing All About?

May 13, 2010 by  
Filed under Featured

Do you remember your first kiss?  Mine was on a motorcycle at the top of a mountain when I was thirteen years old. The boy I was kissing was seventeen.  Earlier he asked if I wanted to go for a ride on his motorcycle.  I said yes.  I was so excited, I knew my first kiss was going to be happening soon.  So I hopped on the back of his bike and off we went.

We rode around until we got high up and could see all the streets and houses below.  We were in the mountains in the state of Rio de Janeiro, where I grew up.

He turned his bike off and we both got off.  He was nervous but managed to ask if I wanted to be his girlfriend.  I too was very nervous but also managed to say yes.  And then it happened.  His lips moist and full touched mine.  Then without being taught anything I just instinctively opened my mouth and my tongue and his touched.  All these amazing feelings started rushing in and at age thirteen I was being baptized into the sensual world of adulthood. Read more

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