May 26, 2010 by  
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When the world says, “Give up,”
Hope whispers, “Try it one more time.”
~Author Unknown

cloud_thumbI have led and lead an unconventional life.  It is made out of the creation and execution of ideas.  I deal with rejection, disappointments and frustrations on a daily basis.  I want to see my ideas come to reality but the road is often long and arduous.

Along the way I have learned to deal with:

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Why Is It So Hard To Change?

May 23, 2010 by  
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4514367690_b9e59f6ac1_mI think one of the reasons it is so hard, it’s because in most cases that would mean we would have to come to terms with having been, having done or having acted in the “wrong” way.

And so because we are so attached to the concepts of right and wrong the intermediary step of recognizing that we and life could have been different if only we had known what we know now, a difficult one to take.

Let me be specific:

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Cultivate Intuition

May 22, 2010 by  
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“The intellect has little to do on the road to discovery. There comes a leap in consciousness, call it intuition or what you will, and the solution comes to you, and you don’t know how or why” – Albert Einstein

Intuition, sixth sense, gut feeling, is that ability to just ‘know’ about a situation, a decision or perhaps a person.

We have become so reliant on looking at the facts and the data rather than recognizing that little voice inside of us that we often end up dismissing it all together.

But intuition is our own and special way to size up a situation and move accordingly. The problem is our conscious mind (or ego) will always try to doubt the intuitive, with “it can’t be”, “what if” “but”.

So we need to slow down enough to really listen to what our gut feeling is trying to tell us and rather than shutting it down we need to encourage our intuition to speak free of our conscious fear based thoughts.   We need to learn to trust ourselves.

So how can we do that?  Below are a few suggestions:

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Shooting Ourselves In The Foot

May 6, 2010 by  
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running man

running man

Ego and anger go hand in hand and they are both very destructive.  I’m not talking about a sense of self when I’m referring to ego.  I’m talking about a sense of pride in the “how dare them” mentality which is just a reflection of a frail ego.  An ego that feels it needs to scream at the world to protect itself because it often feels threatened.  And I am talking about anger that covers up sadness and weakness.

We lose so many opportunities by being angry and by letting our ego speak.  We distort situations to conform to our insecurities and to prove to ourselves that we have to fight others in order to survive.

Ask yourself next time you feel attacked or angry at a situation if: 1 – Are you really being provoked and 2 – Is it really necessary to engage.  Most often the answer will be no.

Don’t waste your time fighting battles that are unnecessary.  Build up YOU and your sense of self and you’ll win the war without having to fire one shot.


There Is No Universe Without The Self

May 2, 2010 by  
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“No phenomenon is a real phenomenon until it is an observed phenomenon.” – Nobel Prize winner physicist John Wheeler

Robert Lanza, M. D., considered one of the leading scientists in the world, currently Chief Scientific Officer at Advanced Cell Technology, Adjunct Professor at Wake Forest University School of Medicine with hundreds of publications and inventions, and over two dozen scientific books is the creator and thinker of a new theory, Biocentrism.

A more accurate understanding of the world requires that we consider it biologically centered. It’s a simple but amazing concept that Biocentrism attempts to clarify: Life creates the universe, instead of the other way around.

That is a completely different way of seeing and thinking about the universe. It means that what we perceive as reality is directly connected to our existence and observation of life.  It means our reality exists based on how we see it and our inter-connectedness.

Below are the seven principles of Biocentrism:

1). What we perceive as reality is a process that involves our consciousness. An “external” reality, if it existed, would by definition have to exist in space. But this is meaningless, because space and time are not absolute realities but rather tools of the human and animal mind.

2). Our external and internal perceptions are inextricably intertwined. They are different sides of the same coin and cannot be divorced from one another.

3). The behavior of subatomic particles, indeed all particles and objects, is inextricably linked to the presence of an observer. Without the presence of a conscious observer, they at best exist in an undetermined state of probability waves.

4). Without consciousness, “matter” dwells in an undetermined state of probability. Any universe that could have preceded consciousness only existed in a probability state.

5). The structure of the universe is explainable only through biocentrism. The universe is fine-tuned for life, which makes perfect sense as life creates the universe, not the other way around. The “universe” is simply the complete spatio-temporal logic of the self.

6). Time does not have a real existence outside of animal-sense perception. It is the process by which we perceive changes in the universe.

7). Space, like time, is not an object or a thing. Space is another form of our animal understanding and does not have an independent reality. We carry space and time around with us like turtles with shells. Thus, there is no absolute self-existing matrix in which physical events occurs independent of life.

We are at the very start of interpreting life in a different way, but one thing is for sure the way we see it/live it has a lot to do with who we are.


Keeping An Eye On Our Ego

April 30, 2010 by  
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Here’s another devastating side-effect of the ego; I know everything and therefore I don’t need to listen to anyone and so I stop learning.

When I was in my early twenties I spent some time with a man who was incredibly smart and well read.  But he had a problem; he thought he was leaps and bounds smarter than anybody else so he never dialogued with anyone.  He only “monologued”.  A couple of years later this man and I went our separate ways and I didn’t see him for four years.

In the four years I didn’t see him, I continued to ask questions and to listen to what others thought and had to say.  So when I saw my old boyfriend to catch up, I found myself sitting in front of the same man I had separated from four years earlier.  He said the same things and thought the same way.  He then didn’t seem so smart and well read anymore.  He seemed like a man who had become stuck because he thought he knew it all.

A certain dose of ego is healthy in the sense of allowing us to assert ourselves without fear.  But ego that wraps pride around itself  is terminal as it kills the self.

I like to keep my ego in check and so I often ask myself when my feathers get ruffled if I’m justified or if it is my ego feeling frail.  If it is the latter, I tell myself: “pipe down, it’s for your own good.”


Thoughts On Self-Confidence

April 28, 2010 by  
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Sometimes we are afraid of taking certain actions.  The reasons can be: 1 – We think we couldn’t possible to X, or  2 – We are afraid if we fail what others will think of us or 3 – What do others think of us in general?  Are we good enough?

Let’s think for a moment about “we think we couldn’t possibly do X”.  The truth is we don’t know. And if we never try we will always be stuck exactly where we are.  Why not shift the focus of our thinking from fear of failure to exhilaration?  Instead of being afraid let’s be curious about what will happen if we do succeed.  By turning a negative into a positive we can overcome our fears and move on. And once we do, let’s make sure not to forget to look back and rejoice in what we have just achieved.

How about fear of what others will think of us if we fail?  That questions points to a different issue.  It points to a fragile ego.  If we realize that life is a journey, full of excitements, wins and losses, we know that the only way to move forward is by having self-confidence and taking risks.  Loss is part of life and so is winning. So let’s not care about what others think of us.

And lastly “are we good enough?”  If we think we are; then we are.  It is truly up to us because 1 – there is no such a thing as good enough  2 – If we are on a journey to live a happy and rich life, we know where we are headed and we don’t need anybody’s approval to keep moving forward.

Being self-confident makes life feel more free and easy.  All the worrying feels like a ton of bricks on our backs, and who needs that?  The time of slavery is over.



April 24, 2010 by  
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It’s so easy for people to misunderstand each other.

Although we are all humans, each one of us has a different process to interpret the world; different education and processing mechanism.  Often things are said with one intention and are heard with another.  Feelings get hurt and relationships are destroyed.  That’s when we need to leave our egos aside and reach out.  Ask yourself what is more important the relationship or your ego?  And what is an ego anyway?

A strong ego doesn’t have to be right every time.  A strong ego can even be right but not need to prove its position.  A weak ego must prove itself to the world.

When a misunderstanding occurs don’t wait for the other person to reach out.  Do it yourself.  Strengthen your ego by not having to be right at all costs.  You being right will be a secret between you and ego.


Are You Really Ready For Love?

April 19, 2010 by  
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featured_1Most of us say we are looking for love.  But are we really?  Or are we looking to cast someone in a role we have developed in our imagination?  Are we looking for the classy man who will defend and saves us?  Or the beautiful woman who is nurturing and sexy?  And once we’ve cast the part, we’ll live happily ever after without ever having a fight or a problem? That’s not being open to love that’s being ready for a casting session.

Loving someone means loving them for who they are; strengths and frailties.  It is respecting them as people who like us struggle to make sense of life’s complexities.  It is also living in the present.

The first step to really being able to fall in love and be in a good relationship starts with loving ourselves.  No knight in shinning armor can rescue anyone and no super hot girl can compensate for a bruised ego.  We rescue our own selves and we build our own egos.

As we learn who we are and embrace all parts of ourselves we learn to love others as well.  Being there for ourselves and having our own backs allows us to be whole and able to truly share with someone else.

So take the time to get to know you.  Feed your heart and soul with small pleasures that give you contentment, ask yourself what is really important to you, slow down and concentrate on life as its happening not as you imagine it should be,  laugh as much as you can, and as you are busy living, life will happen to you.


Missed Opportunities

April 14, 2010 by  
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How many times have we stopped ourselves from saying or doing things we wanted to because we were afraid of being judged or afraid we would be exposed?

Our egos are so frail that we can’t take rejection or judgment and we end up missing out on experiences.

When I was younger I was very impulsive.  Whatever got into my head I did without any consideration for consequences.  Needless to say I got myself in a lot of trouble. When I got a little older, I started doing some crazy stuff because of my need to create drama in my life.  Drama kept me from taking responsibility and from finding out who I really was.  Eventually I got tired of all the drama and asked myself the questions; Who am I? And what do I really want?  Those questions take a long time to answer but they are really worth getting plus the process gets us to be in touch with ourselves.

I am now at a point that I no longer need to be impulsive or to create drama.  I can ponder situations and make decisions.  I can also expose myself and say what I want without feeling naked because my ego is stronger.  I have accepted not being perfect and I have understood I am not in competition with anybody else.

I cherish who I am and my path.  I am energized about the possibilities.  The world feels safer and the most exciting is that I no longer need to miss out on possibilities life offers me.  There is nothing to hide.  I am what I am.


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