Empower Yourself And Make The Changes You Need

June 19, 2012 by  
Filed under Blog

Making life changing decisions is tough business.  It means letting go of something familiar and jumping into the unknown.

Even if the familiar isn’t quite right, it is still familiar, which means we have already developed coping mechanisms to deal with and to live within a certain set of circumstances.

The unknown on the other hand is just that; unknown.  It can be more pleasant or less.  But, more importantly it will require us to adapt and change.  And that is what we don’t like – a feeling of not quite knowing how to be and behave.

But, here is a secret: If we don’t do the changing on our own, life will take over and do it for us.

So, let’s practice being mature and in charge and learn how we can make tough decisions on our own:

First, if a situation doesn’t feel right or comfortable, chances are there is something amiss.  Ignoring it, it will only allow whatever it is to become more difficult.  So, let’s ask ourselves why we are not comfortable.  It is important when doing the asking to go deeper than the feeling of anger, envy, or jealousies – which are emotions that serve to masquerade others – so we can find out the truth.  Once we have our answer, we need to gather up strength, make sure the time is right, then focus and take action.

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Is The Glass Half Full Or Half Empty? Your Choice

November 14, 2010 by  
Filed under Blog

One of the concepts that we seem to have a difficult time with is what one of Shakespeare’s quotes addresses: “Things are neither good nor bad but thinking makes it so.”  Or in more colloquial terms: “Is the glass half full or half empty?”  Depends on how you see it.

Every experience carries in itself an unlimited number of possibilities for us to experience different emotions and reactions.  Which emotion or reaction we will have to a situation depends on us.  Even the ultimate – the loss of a loved one – has the possibility to allow us to create something positive in our life experience.  In the loss we may find strength and creativity we didn’t know we had.  We may find a depth of love we were not aware of.  Or we may find a different set of values and path.

Knowing how much say we actually have in the way we experience our lives is empowering and liberating.

Below is an excerpt I found in Oprah’s magazine.

“… friend, Margo, had to get back from a business trip in time for an extremely important meeting at work. But somehow, she didn’t allow enough time to get to the airport, and she missed her plane. Margo began rebuking herself: “I should have left last night. I should have taken an earlier plane.” Then a funny thing happened. As Margo thought about the things she could have done differently, she realized that she always had choices; in fact, she chose her reaction to this situation. She decided not to obsess about it, and, after calling her boss to apologize, used her newfound free time to take a walk. As Margo relaxed, her creativity flowed and she started to feel positive about the future, whatever the outcome.

The next morning, when she arrived at work, she learned that several people had been similarly delayed, and the meeting had been postponed until that day.

Margo was a smash. Having let go of her fear and self-recrimination, she had a lot more to offer. Missing her flight would have been a failure only if she had refused to learn.

Spiritual lessons are everywhere. When we see our work as part of the playing field for personal growth, we become less enmeshed in it and less frantic about the outcome. Then we can enjoy it more, and we can make a greater contribution. ..”  Anne Wilson Schaef, Ph.D., is the author of Meditations for Women Who Do Too Much and Meditations for Living in Balance.