Let Go Of Impatience

August 9, 2012 by  
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I was born without patience.  Actually, I was born wanting things to happen instantly.  I want it, I take action, I want the result.  Unfortunately, I have had to learn that life doesn’t work that way.  It doesn’t, simply because while I would like to be the center of the universe, I am not.

Involved in everything we want are others who also have their wants and desires as well as the unexpected because life has its own rhythm.   So, rather than live a life of frustrations, I work at cultivating patience.

We need to do it because we are tested on a regular basis.  It seems that standing in line or on hold is now a daily occurrence.   And so if we don’t practice patience we are going to be buried under a mountain of frustration.

In terms of goals, it seems that achieving what we want now takes more time and more work.  There is great competition and many obstacles.   So again without practicing patience we will simply self-destruct.

When I know I have to wait long at a doctor’s office or hold a phone to my ear until it feels it’s become part of my being; I talk to myself before it happens.  I do it as if talking to a child.  I remind myself that losing my “cool” won’t do me any good.  It will actually make things worse.  I say to myself: “If you want such and such to happen you have to keep calm.”  I also make sure to have reading or writing materials so if I can, I’ll make myself busy.

In terms of goals – that’s a tough of one.  You really want something, you’ve done all you could, and now you have to wait.  But there lies the key to patience.  You’ve done all you could.  Once I hit that point I tell myself to let go.  There is nothing else more to do then to stay busy with other things and let life take its course.  The minute I feel the feeling of frustration or impatience creeping in, I turn my attention to something else.  I make myself busy.  If my mind is engage with living then I have no time to let frustration build up.

Try these techniques and if they don’t work for you, find your own and let me know.  Dealing with frustration and impatience is a lifelong commitment.   I shall have other suggestions soon.

 

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If You Can’t Change Others, Change Yourself

July 20, 2010 by  
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Okay, here is a hard one to learn; we can’t change others but we can change ourselves.  Why do I say it is hard?  Because we are so attached to proving either our truth, intent or fairness, that we keep coming up with different ways to make our point even if every attempt only brings us frustration and disappointments.

There is nothing wrong with trying to communicate our thoughts and feelings but what becomes a waste is when it is obvious that the recipient is not ready or doesn’t want to see things in a different way.  They are stuck in their position and methodology and they are not going to change no matter what we do.

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Don’t Fall For The Casting Couch

April 27, 2010 by  
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We are always trying to look for quick solutions and when they don’t happen we feel sad and frustrated.

Let me give you a few examples:  If we want to be in a relationship we take the first guy/girl we find and say to ourselves: He/she is it.   It doesn’t matter he/she may not be the best choice for us. What matters is that we are done casting the part of a partner/lover.  Of course when the relationship doesn’t work we blame ourselves, we blame them and we blame the world.  And we fail to realize that in our hurry to put one need/problem/issue aside we rushed to the first possibility and thought: “issue solved” and moved on.

What about when we are feeling blue and we reach for the first soothing anything only to feel worse after the fact?

I’m not suggesting we think a million times before we do anything.  But I am suggesting being in tune with ourselves so we can hear our inner voices screaming at us: “Stop type casting and look for the real deal”.  Our inner-selves always knows the truth, stop and listen to yourself.

You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition.  What you’ll discover will be wonderful.  What you’ll discover is yourself.  ~Alan Alda

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Finding Love After Loss

May 11, 2009 by  
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My husband died on August 15th 2008 at 2am.

We met 5 years ago and had the most incredible life together.  After kissing many frogs and frogets, Chris and I were kissing each other and marveling at our luck at having finally found one another.  We were full of hope for a life together. And full of love.

But then two years later that annoying saying “all good things come to an end” happened.  Chris was diagnosed with a very rare cancer and needed a liver transplant a.s.a.p or he wouldn’t make it.

From Los Angeles we flew in an air ambulance to Jacksonville, Florida where he would have a better chance for a transplant.  After many visits to the ER, and with only hours to spare, Chris received a new liver.

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