What Do We Do With The Feeling Of Emptiness?

December 22, 2010 by  
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It’s raining cats and dogs here in Los Angeles.  While driving home last night, I called a girlfriend in Brazil to keep me company as I drove through the flooded streets.

My friend has known me since I’m nine years old.  The wonderful thing about long standing relationships – especially the ones you have since childhood – is that they know and have seen you through different stages of life.  My friend and I have great intimacy and love for each other.

We started to talk about the empty “hole” people feel from time to time.  Why do we sometimes feel blue or anxious or unhappy when nothing really has happened to warrant those feelings?

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Learning To Set Limits

June 8, 2010 by  
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our orchidsNow that’s a hard one if you are like me.  Setting limits without anger or fear means we respect ourselves enough to say “yes” to certain things and “no” to others.

I’ve always had a hard time doing that because I have always preferred to suck it up than to confront others and risk arguments or ill feelings.  And because I am someone with a great amount of personal resilience, I’ve done some heavy duty sucking up.

But as I dig into who I am and the life I want to live, I realize that at the bottom of my sucking up is a deep seeded feeling that I have no rights.  It doesn’t matter where that comes from.  It matters how I am going to deal with the feelings now.  So I ask myself, why the needs of others – right or wrong – take prevalence over mine?  And I realize that if I don’t look out for myself (read: respect) why would I expect others to do so?

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