Wise Up And Take Time For Yourself

May 23, 2011 by  
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The below CNN.com post discusses vacation or lack off in the United States.  I love the post because it gives statistics to a subject I’ve written quite a bit about.

Somehow somewhere the idea of happiness and accomplishment in the US became tied up with work.  Here we wear multi-tasking and working seven days a week as a badge of honor.  Here always being plugged in makes us feel important or needed.

I wonder if in this country’s past history, a group of men got together and said: “How do we make people work around the clock – without them thinking about it – so we can make tons of money? Let’s convince them, they will be seen as respectable and dependable.”

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Objects Have No History. Hearts Do.

September 20, 2010 by  
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Angie Rubin

Last night I watched The Time Traveler’s Wife.  I knew it wasn’t a very good film but I’m always interested in anything “supernatural” so after dinner I popped the DVD in my player and watched the movie.  At the end, although I did not become emotionally invested in the story, I was left with a sense of loss and thoughts of time.

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The Cab Ride

May 12, 2010 by  
Filed under Featured

I was just sent the below story and I wanted to share with you.  What I most like about it, is what the following phrase by the writer: “We’re conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments.  But great moments often catch us unaware-beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.”  Enjoy it.

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I arrived at the address and honked the horn. After waiting a few minutes I  walked to the door and knocked.. ‘Just a minute’, answered a frail, elderly voice. I could hear something being dragged across the floor.

After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 90′s stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940′s movie.

By her side was a small nylon suitcase. The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was  covered with sheets.

There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware.

‘Would you carry my bag out to the car?’ she said. I took the suitcase to the cab, then returned to assist the woman.

She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb. She kept thanking me for my kindness. ‘It’s nothing’, I told her.. ‘I just try to treat my passengers  the way I would want my mother treated’.  ‘Oh, you’re such a good boy’, she said. When we got in the cab, she gave me an address and then asked, ‘Could you drive through downtown?’

‘It’s not the shortest way,’ I answered quickly..

‘Oh, I don’t mind,’ she said. ‘I’m in no hurry. I’m on my way to a hospice’.  I looked in the rear-view mirror. Her eyes were glistening. ‘I don’t have any family left,’ she continued in a soft voice.. ‘The doctor says I don’t have very long.’ I quietly reached over and shut off the meter.

‘What route would you like me to take?’ I asked.  For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator. We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl.

Sometimes she’d ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing.  As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said, ‘I’m tired. Let’s go now’.

We drove in silence to the address she had given me. It was a low building, like a small convalescent home,
with a driveway that passed under a portico.  Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move. They must have been expecting her.

I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. The woman was already seated in a wheelchair.
‘How much do I owe you?’ she asked, reaching into her purse.  ‘Nothing,’ I said’. You have to make a living,’ she answered.  ‘There are other passengers,’ I responded.  Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. She held onto me tightly.

‘You gave an old woman a little moment of joy,’ she said. ‘Thank you.’  I squeezed her hand, and then walked into the dim morning light.. Behind me, a door shut. It was the sound of the closing of a life..

I didn’t pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly lost in thought. For the rest of that day, I could hardly talk. What if that woman had gotten an angry driver, or one who was impatient to end his shift?

What if I had refused to  take the run, or had honked once, then driven away?  On a quick review, I don’t think that I have done anything more important in my life.

We’re conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments.  But great moments often catch us unaware-beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.

PEOPLE MAY NOT REMEMBER EXACTLY WHAT YOU DID, OR WHAT YOU SAID BUT THEY WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER HOW YOU MADE THEM FEEL.

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Connecting The Dots

August 15, 2009 by  
Filed under Blog

I often try to think about our existence in relationship to history and the world at large.  I do that looking to connect the dots and hopefully find more meaning than our routines offer us. 

I’m willing to bet that most of you reading this blog have experienced the game playing of time, the trickster. The never ending years to get to be eighteen years old and then the faster than the speed of light to get to be the age we’re in. 

I am now fully aware that one day I’m going to be an old woman and that day will come sooner rather than later and when it does arrive I hope that I will have understood my existence a little bit better than I understand it today.

Yesterday, I did some reading about love, sex and spirituality.  While doing it I came across the historic evolution of women and sex.  I think that is a very important topic not just for women but for men as well.  When we are in partnerships we want to experience the greatest amount of pleasure and growth in our sexual lives.  So both sides need to commit and it shouldn’t be a job it should be ecstasy.

Yes, it is true that until the 50s (Kinsey) and then 60s-70s (Masters and Johnson) the idea of female orgasm was not widely accepted but if you go back in history when females were the guardians of spiritual things you will find that sexual intercourse in most cases was much more spiritual and ritualistic. 

Today we are all in a hurry.  We don’t have time to relax and connect and end up losing out on a lot of what life is about. 

According to Linda E. Savage Ph.D. (www.goddesstherapy.com) and author of “Reclaiming Goddess Sexuality” the great problem of sexual experience today is that women try to fit into a male sexual model.  While males can achieve fulfillment quickly through intercourse, women need to be caressed, and our imagination stimulated to achieve fulfillment.  Spending the time without the goal of having an orgasm is often more satisfying to women than the orgasm itself.

I know to my husband giving me pleasure was often more important than achieving his own.  With him I finally had found someone who truly was not in hurry and loved being with me thus our love making was special.

So I’ve gone around the world in my thinking to come to the point I want to make which is we need to be conscientious of our existence.  We need to connect the dots with history and we need to slow down otherwise one day we will wake up old and wrinkled and wonder what happened.

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