How To Accept Our “Mistakes”

August 20, 2010 by  
Filed under Blog

I am someone who is really tough on myself.  Somehow somewhere I have bought into a notion that I have to be “perfect”.  I know that is not only an impossibility but not a fair request because what I am after does not exist.

I have used quotation marks on the word perfect because there isn’t just one kind of perfect.  Each one of us has a “perfect” for what the right answers or outcomes would be for each situation.  The result being that in each relationship or experience we have to negotiate our kind of “perfects”.

We also don’t have the whole picture.   And what is the whole picture anyway?  We don’t know and it depends on our point of view.

Johann Hari, a journalist, writes:  our abilities to perceive and reason are painfully limited, while the world is unutterably complex. We are peering at an entire universe through a drinking straw.

So what do I do about a mind and a heart that are after the impossible?  I re-educate myself.

I have been on a path of acceptance of my humanity.  I now know I can’t always say and do what I consider to be the right thing.  I deal with that thought by reminding myself there is always the next moment or tomorrow to do things differently.  I tell myself as long as I have the right intention every situation is a needed learning experience transforming who I am.

I feel anxious about being less than “perfect” I then connect to my breath and I talk to myself as I would to somebody else who would be sharing their frustration about being less than “perfect”.  As I would tell them, I tell myself there is no point in looking at the past just to blame and chastise.  The only reason to look back to what has already happened is to understand how we can be different in the present.  And finally I say; none of us are perfect.

We shouldn’t demand of ourselves that which we don’t request of others.  Perfection is unattainable and it doesn’t fit in with what life’s journey is about; experience that results in transformation.  If we never had to struggle, learn and make decisions the end of our lives would look the same as the beginning.

I have been able to accept my less than perfect self.  I still have ways to go but living without the pressure of always being “right” is a much better way to live.

If you are like me, I hope you too are well on your way of embracing your failures with the same compassion as you embrace your successes.

As human beings, our greatness lies not so much in being able to remake the world – that is the myth of the atomic age – as in being able to remake ourselves – Gandhi

  • Winsor Pilates

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